Dear “New Mama” Self,
You will never look at life the same way again when you become a mom.
Just when you thought you were already living your best life as a young professional who somehow knew what you wanted to do and where you dreamed to go, life threw you the sweetest surprise ever and you then found yourself figuring everything out again.
Those two lines on your pregnancy test were just the beginning of a rollercoaster ride that is motherhood. There are ups and downs, twists and turns, climbs and drops. It is crazy, exciting, challenging, amazing, frustrating, and beautiful all at the same time. Nevertheless, you are so in for the ride because you know deep down inside your heart, everything will be worth it. You will soon discover that being a mother is profoundly, inexplicably, extremely satisfying.
Giving birth is tough, and so are the days ahead as a new mama. You may find yourself anxious (most of the time) and angry (occasionally). You will learn how strong and capable you are as you navigate this new chapter in your life. Bringing a beautiful child to this world also means birthing a new you, so take your time getting to know this new person and shower her with lots of love and affirmation. You may not like what you are seeing in the mirror now, but there are several ways for you to start embracing your postpartum body. Take your time recovering and be kind to yourself. Don’t hold back on self-care — do something that sparks joy because the secret to a happy baby is a happy mama!
Being a mama is a role that demands round-the-clock attention so you will probably struggle with sleep, especially if you’re breastfeeding. Breastfeeding requires a big time commitment from you and it can be a real challenge. For one, getting some shut-eye becomes a precious luxury when you need to feed on demand so take a well-deserved nap when you can. Most importantly, ask for help. You do not have to do everything. Let your husband or relative know if you need assistance or if you want to take a break. A strong support system — the “village” that will help you raise your child — can make your life easier and your load lighter.
You do not need to know everything all at once. We all learn as we go because motherhood is a continuous learning experience. So the next time mom guilt seeps in and you feel like you are a failure, remember that we are all just trying to do the very best we can to nurture, nourish, and nurse a tiny human being. You will get frustrated and disappointed many times over, and that’s totally okay. Learn to make peace with the moments when life doesn’t pan out the way you’d like it to. But also celebrate your small motherhood wins — you deserve it!
Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. As a new mama, you will try to juggle the demands of personal and professional responsibilities while taking care of yourself and a little one. And most of the time, you will be successful in doing so. So you’re kind of a big deal, mama. I hope you do not forget that.
Nothing beats the amount of love you have for your newborn and you will never ever love anything or anyone like this. As you tide over extra challenging days, remember to enjoy every moment as you watch your own motherhood story unfold.
Spoiler alert: You are going to get through all of these and you are going to be so proud of yourself!
Love,
Your “More Experienced Mama” Self
