As your child grows older, they learn more and more about how they see themselves. From what they think of themselves to seeing that they’re their own individual person, there’s a lot that goes on in your child’s brain as they grow older. What’s more, all of the things that have to do with their own self-perception have to do with their self-esteem.
Self-esteem can be synonymous with self-confidence. However, whatever the case may be, this has to do with how positively or negatively they view themselves. What’s more, their sense of self-esteem gets established as they continue to experience all the things life has to offer them.
Yet, while self-esteem can be built as they explore the outside world, it also starts at home. What’s more, there’s a lot that you can do to influence whether or not their self-esteem can get built or broken down. Of course, since every parent wants the best for their child, it makes sense that they do what they can to help them build up their self-esteem. But, how can a mama do this? Well, this article will help you figure out how you can do exactly that!
Importance of Self Esteem
When you talk about self-esteem, you pertain to how a person values and perceives themself. If one’s self-esteem is high, chances are they are confident in their abilities and think positively of themselves. On the converse, low self-esteem may be more synonymous with a negative sense of self and a lack of belief in one’s abilities.
Self-esteem is important in a child as it helps influence the way they continue to live their life, view experiences, and, ultimately, grow and develop. So, it’s essential that their self-esteem is built well so that they can make the most out of their own experiences and use them to become an even better person. It also helps them do things like achieve what they want to do with their lives.
Knowing this, you can tell that it’s important you help do what you can to aid in building their sense of self-esteem. But, how exactly can you do that as a mama?
Self-Esteem Building Tips
Helping your child build their sense of self-esteem may seem like a lot of pressure, especially as this can affect how they live their lives in the future. However, it’s not that difficult to aid in this process. What’s more, the things you can do are all doable at home. You just need to pay a little extra attention so that you can maximize your impact on them and their self esteem. With that in mind, here are a few things you can do to help them build their self-esteem.
Teach, Then Step Back
Among the many things that factor into self-esteem, a sense of independence would be one of the most common. Having a sense of independence helps you believe that you are capable of doing things on your own. It’s much like having belief in your own abilities and what you can do with them.
However, before someone learns how to be independent, they must know how to do certain things first. So, if you want your child to learn how to be independent, it’s important to first teach them how to do certain things. Whether it’s cleaning up after themselves or doing chores, it’s essential that you teach them how to do these things first. Once you’re sure they know how to do it, then take a step back and let them do it on their own.
By taking a step back, you acknowledge that you believe they’re capable of doing a certain thing on their own. This will then help instill in their minds that you believe in them and know they can accomplish whatever task you expect of them. As a result, they will be able to build on their belief in themselves. What’s more, if they keep doing things like certain chores successfully, their self-esteem will continue to build up as they know what they can do.
Let Them Fail
Of course, sometimes, things won’t go according to plan. No one’s perfect, after all. Unfortunately, your child isn’t an exception to that rule. So, they will fail at some point. Whether it’s them being unable to accomplish their chores or them not winning a contest at school, your child will experience some form of failure.
However, as much as it sounds harsh to let them fail, there is something to be learned from in failure. From something as simple as breaking a glass while clearing up a table to something as major as failing an exam, there is something to be learned in these instances.
Your child may not initially understand this, but things like not passing a test will teach them how to handle it. It’ll also teach them how to move forward from it. Like the saying goes, “there’s no use crying over spilled milk,” and this is where it can apply. So, let your child fail. But, also help them learn how to process the failure and show them that it’s not the end nor is it something they have to dwell on. Instead, show them that they can always learn what went wrong and move forward knowing that they have a chance to not let it happen again. This will then help teach them that they have the ability of getting things right, thus helping them build on their belief in their capabilities.
Criticize, But Kindly
In line with your child failing, sometimes they will also make mistakes. Much like failures, mistakes are also teachable moments. But, these teachable moments only come about if mistakes are handled properly. In this case, criticizing your child for their mistakes is one way to help build their self-esteem. However, it can only happen if done right.
It’s easy to point out a mistake. But, helping them learn from it can be hard because of a few things. For example, if you point out a mistake and are harsh about it, they may not necessarily learn from it. They may instead hide any future mistakes as they know it’ll only make you mad. However, if you show them why the mistake happened and what they can do about it, they’ll learn how to process it more and also how to handle similar ones in the future. This can at least help them know that, much like failures, mistakes aren’t the end.
Praise, But Within Reason
Of course, many parents believe that praising their children is one of the key elements to building self-esteem. However, this isn’t always the case. While praise can help a child, sometimes too much of it can make things counterproductive.
If you praise your child too much, they might end up believing that they’re perfect and don’t need to try any harder. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. Praising them too much can have many pitfalls. Aside from making them believe they don’t need to apply themselves or try, it can also end up wrecking their self-esteem later on. When you’re not there to praise them and they mess up, they might have an entire crisis and wonder if there was any truth to how they see themselves. This can only mean more problems.
So, while praising your child is good, it’s important to do it within reason. Praise them when they handle things well or when they achieve something they believed they couldn’t initially do. However, don’t do it to the point that they stop trying because they believe they’re perfect already.
Love Them Unconditionally, And Let Them Know It
This should go without saying, but a parent’s love should be unconditional. Whether a child is an achiever or has the tendency to make a lot of mistakes, a parent should love them all the same. With that in mind, it’s important to let your child know this.
Whether they’re first place or last, it should be important to let your child know that you don’t love them any different. You’re still going to be rooting for them, cheering them on, and giving them the same affection you always do. By staying consistent with this, they’ll at least learn that they’re worthy of love no matter what. They’ll also know that they’re still a person of value no matter where they place or what they do (or don’t) achieve.
Building self-esteem can begin at home, and it’s important that it does. After all, this is the root of their self-value and self-perception. If they have a good sense of self-esteem, they’ll see themselves in a good light and also be able to grow as they go on with their lives. Fortunately, helping build self-esteem at home isn’t that hard to do. These tips listed above are some simple and doable ways of helping with this process. So, if you’re looking for ways to help with your child’s self-esteem, keep these tips in mind!
