When a mama is pregnant, everyone does their best to keep her nine-month pregnancy smooth sailing and stress-free. When a mama gives birth, there are some cases when they painfully admit that everyone’s focus drastically shifts from her to the baby.
This shouldn’t be the case, however, as the transition to motherhood is a very important time in a mama’s life, and they, too, need all the love and care as they heal and adjust both physically, mentally, and emotionally.
As a mama, here are twelve important reminders the next time you’re feeling a bit overwhelmed with everything you need to do, or when people don’t seem to understand what you’re going through.
1.) You are doing great, mama. Don’t doubt it.
It’s easy to forget to remind yourself that you’re doing a great job, even if you really are. There is no perfect mother, and doing the best you can is more than enough. Don’t think you’re not doing a great job, and never compare yourself to other mamas, as there is no template to a great mama! However you choose to raise your children is on you – and you’re doing a great job.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to simply breathe and soak in all the emotions. You just brought a beautiful life into the world, mama. Isn’t that magical? Appreciate the wonderful thing that you’ve done and you’ll realize how great you’ve been doing since the beginning.
2.) It’s okay not to enjoy every moment of the fourth trimester.
It can be easy to feel guilty whenever you’re not enjoying a certain part of your fourth trimester routine, because society makes us believe that motherhood is supposed to be one constant journey of bliss and happiness. While definitely, those moments exist and happen a lot, they aren’t constant.
Caring for a baby is a roller coaster ride of emotions, adjustments, and challenges. It won’t always be fun, and it can get stressful, challenging, and downright overwhelming. Not enjoying every single motherhood experience does not mean you’re a bad mama – it just makes you real.
3.) Your baby doesn’t mean to make you have a hard time.
For nine months, you were all your baby knew, mama. So now that they’re out in the world, they’re always longing for your comfort. This longing often comes with loud crying and wailing, which is their means of communication while they can’t talk. While it can get frustrating, always remember that your baby doesn’t mean for you to have a hard time – they are just asking for their needs to be met.
4.) You are still healing.
While being pregnant brings a lot of changes, these are often expected and well-prepared for. You visit your doctor every month and get all the answers you need as you go through the three trimesters of pregnancy.
After giving birth, it can be quite easy to forget that even though you’re up and caring for another human being, your body is still going through drastic changes. There’s the vaginal bleeding that occurs for weeks, the uncomfortable feeling in your breasts, the hair fall, and the bodyache you feel from carrying your baby, but these are some of the postpartum experiences you actually see. Inside, your body is healing itself too. So mama, take it easy and don’t forget to care for yourself, too and remember that what you’re doing is something to be extremely proud of.
5.) You don’t need to “bounce back” from anything.
After giving birth, people often expect mamas to “bounce back.” Whether that’s their waistline, their 9-to-5 job, their sex life, or running the household. Because of this expectation for mamas to go back to their normal routines after giving birth, it can be easy to feel disappointed when you don’t, and it gives you a feeling of failure.
Mama, this is your reminder that you absolutely do not need to “bounce back.” Throw that phrase out the window and remember you’re doing the best you can. Life is different now that you have a baby to care for, and you’re allowed to feel that change. However, feeling guilty and feeling like a failure should not be some of the feelings you embrace, as there is nothing to feel guilty about.
6.) You are not alone.
The first few months of motherhood can feel isolating, especially when your friends aren’t on the same timeline as you. Sometimes, even your partner seems out of reach, and it can be easy to feel alone. Remember that this isn’t the case, mama, and there are people who are willing to help you. Please don’t hesitate to reach out and ask for help when you need it.
7.) YOU know your baby best.
Every new mama goes through intense physical and emotional changes. Top this off with caring for a newborn, and you can be left feeling like you’re not doing a great job. “Am I doing this right?” you might ask yourself at one point.
With so many things to consider, it can be easy to second guess yourself when people start giving you different types of parenting advice. While they usually mean well, the advice can sometimes make you feel like they know better than you.
The thing is, mama, no one knows your baby better than YOU. So, you can listen to the advice they give and take what applies to you and your little one, but at the end of the day, trust yourself the most. Listen to your gut, and do what you feel is right and best for you and your baby.
8.) Taking care of yourself is NOT selfish.
When you’re a new mama, it can be easy to feel guilty when you’re not taking care of your child even for just a couple of minutes. This guilt makes you think you should spend every single second spending time with your little one, but that’s not the case.
Having a baby doesn’t mean you need to let go of yourself and put their needs above yours. The truth is, this is the best time to care for yourself even more.
Taking good care of yourself means you are energized and feel your best. When you’re at your best, you’re able to conquer motherhood even better, and everything else you need to do. So, let self-care be a part of your daily routine, mama. Remember: you are loved, needed, and appreciated. Give yourself the care you deserve.
TAGS:third-trimester
