Dealing with teenage girls can be difficult for parents. It’s during this time they become more outspoken and vocal since they begin to explore their thoughts and emotions a little more thoroughly and deeply. Teenage girls also have to go through a variety of physical and emotional changes.They begin to feel a handful of changes that helps them shape or form their relationships and interests beyond the family. Consequently, they develop a sense of autonomy and this occasionally makes them disagree with their parents.
Now, if you’re a parent to girls approaching (or are already in) their teen years, it can get quite difficult or challenging to deal with, especially when it comes to figuring out your parenting styles. But, thankfully, you aren’t alone as there have been tons of parents who have been in your shoes before.
Our team at edamama has compiled our top 5 tips and tricks to note when raising a teenage girl. So, if you’re wondering about what the strategies are or simply want to know about certain things that people don’t tell you when it comes to raising girl teens, then read on to find out more!
Be Mindful of Sensitive Information
One thing mamas love to do with other moms is share information about their children - whether it’s their child’s amazing achievements, such as the awards they get in school or some hurdle they learned to overcome, or a negative occurrence such as when they get in trouble or if their grades start to drop, a mama can’t help but share their thoughts, emotions, and comments with their fellow mamas.
Now, while this may be normal and is an accepted practice anywhere in the world, especially when mamas need advice, we do have to bear in mind that all this can make our daughters uncomfortable. As a parent, you’re the go-to person your daughters rely on for advice and help, so they trust you not to air their business, be it good or bad. So, while it may be a source of relief or contentment to share your thoughts about what your daughter’s growing up to be or what her likes and dislikes may end up being, you should try to be mindful of what information about your teenage girl you end up sharing to other mamas. After all, no one else needs to know everything about the teen daughter except for her parents. Do not break her trust by letting other people know about her entire life.
Learn to Listen to Her
Sometimes, the best course of action is to simply listen. As a parent, you will always want your kids to learn from you, and you will always want to fix things for them or with them. But, at times, the best thing to do for teen daughters is to leave things be and not try to fix it, preach about it, tell anecdotes, or solve the issue.
You simply have to listen and let them lean on you. Teenagers won't listen to what we have to say until they feel like we care about them and are interested in what they have to say. They will let us in if we just listen without passing judgment or offering suggestions. Now is the moment to pay attention. Teenage girls will be open to listening to a parent’s counsel once they are convinced that they’re actually cared for and understood.
Help Her Learn to Navigate Social Media Properly & Wisely
These days there’s really no escaping social media. After all, it’s a powerful tool and one that can be of great help if used properly. But, of course, kids can use it as a way of bullying anyone and everyone, and your teenage daughter can either be on the receiving end or she could be the one influenced to bully others.
As a mama, it’s your job to help your teenage daughter learn how to use social media wisely. This allows her to navigate through social media and figure out how this can positively affect her instead of seeing the ways it can bring her down.
Social media can influence anyone into thinking of themselves as ugly or pretty, fat or thin, and acceptable or unacceptable. The last thing any mama would want for her teenage daughter is to have her feel horrible for the things she sees on social media. So, if you have a teenage girl, teach her how to properly use social media, that way she can learn to see what is good for her and what she should be steering clear of.
Ignore the Eye Rolls
Teenage girls are at that stage in life where they’d rather roll their eyes over something someone has said than actually listen and take whatever was said into consideration. Don’t take this personally as this is probably their way of saying that they already know but they’re not yet ready to understand, or that they would rather not talk about it at all.
There will come a point in time when you will have some wise words for your teenage daughter that she just rolls her eyes to. Learn to ignore it and instead just let her learn it or understand it in her own time. This is something every teen does, so avoid giving them the power by reacting to this and simply go about leaving them alone to figure things out for themselves. It may make your blood boil, but in time, you can trust that they will get your point or they will learn the lesson you want them to learn.
Communication is Actually Key
Remember mamas, you are not your daughter and she is not you, so before you call her out for something, put yourself in her shoes. Also, you may want to remember that she may not be like her sisters (if she has any). So, act in a way that you would want to be spoken to in that situation. Be understanding and learn to communicate with her since, for sure, she is still figuring out how to talk to you too!
Don't minimize her disappointments and annoyances; instead, offer compassion and empathy. For instance, avoid saying something like "Do not worry- he/she was not good for you!" if she broke up with whoever she was dating, and instead use phrases like "I get that it hurts now and it must be hard to get by right now, but things will get better!”
Teen girls have a lot of thoughts and emotions to process so having a parental figure to talk to or having a mama to help her figure out life with her is great. But, you as a mama will have to figure out when to talk to her, how to talk to her, and how to help her express herself better so that you can guide her properly too.
As a mama, you cannot deny that mistakes will be made many times, especially when it comes to raising teenage girls. Despite the fact that every girl is unique, teenage daughters face a variety of difficulties including soaring hormones, conflicting signals, and social pressures. Even if you have certain practices you apply with your daughters, there are certain easy goals that you can try as a parent of a teen girl, like the ones we've listed here. They can sometimes be a little difficult to meet yet gratifying when you finally reach them. So, give yourself some leeway if you slip up and make mistakes. After all, teenage girls have a way of confusing a mama’s well-intended or reasonable actions. Breathe and refocus your efforts.
